The Peace of Wild Things
by HecateA
Summary: Maybe they're bigger than life- an evil witch, the prince of thieves, murderers and con men, victims and monarchs... maybe they're too wild for this quiet life they've made. Oneshot.


**Me again with my stupid fuzzy plotless story that nobody reads but that I've been crazily producing all week as I stress about what in the world we're going to get on tomorrow's episode. Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own the premise of OUaT, Regina or Robin Hood. TW: rape.**

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 **The Peace of Wild Things**

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 _When despair grows in me_ _  
and I wake in the night at the least sound  
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,  
I come into the peace of wild things  
who do not tax their lives with forethought  
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.  
And I feel above me the day-blind stars  
waiting for their light._

-The Peace of Wild Things (paraphrased), _Wendell Berry_

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The Enchanted Forest may be magic, but even magic worked with causes and effects and ups and downs. In Storybrooke, these consequences even felt more real. Or maybe it was just that Regina felt their weight now.

Either way she'd woken up at midnight after dreaming of some not-so-pleasant Evil Queen fabrications. Actually they were worst than that: they were chilling. She'd dreamed that her children had traveled back to the Enchanted Forest's past. They'd found her while looking for something familiar, and the Evil Queen hadn't known who they were and had had them…

Yes. There were some looks that she'd never wanted to see on Sawyer or Roland's faces. Or Lucy- tiny, lovely Lucy who'd been too fearless and trusting in Regina to notice that something was off and that the Queen…

At any rate, now she was up at two o'clock in the morning. The fact that Robin was nowhere to be seen hadn't helped her settle down, but now she'd done her round of bedroom check-ups to make sure that everyone was safe and sound in bed and that secured her a lot. A quick text to Henry had confirmed that he was alright too, albeit in the midst an all-nighter. There was one closed door in the house and it was Faye's. Regina assumed Robin was there, and couldn't exactly bet on how long he'd be with her for.

She went downstairs and made herself a cup of tea. She could feel the ingredients in the sleeping charm act up, but their effects seemed to fly right over her without hitting any of the check points her potions usually did.

She opened the windows of the bedroom and stood on the balcony for a few minutes, feeling the wind hit her. She saw rustling in the woods and remembered that it was the full moon. Storybrooke had the right support available for Lycanthropes, but it was best not to get in a werewolf's way or let them catch your scent. She locked herself back inside.

She paced the room and looked through old pictures and photocopied pages of the Book that were tucked in the closet. She tried reading, which didn't calm her nerves down at all (she tried several different books). She cleared out her emails and did some work, but it pissed her off if anything. Even Henry had finished his all-nighter and was now tucked in bed (or sleeping on the floor of his dorm room; there were some things Regina didn't _want_ to know about college).

But here was Regina, up and awake and lucid as ever. Maybe more than usual considering all the names, the faces, the cruel fates that kept coming to mind.

Robin crept back into the room, barefoot with his hair ruffled, while she was sitting on the bed and crumpling up the latest issue of _The Mirror_ about an hour later.

"Did I wake you?" He asked.

"No," Regina said. "You were gone when I woke up."

"Faye was having an episode. Not sure if there was a nightmare with that, but she was rather upset." Robin said. "She's asleep now, we can talk some more in the morning."

Regina nodded. Robin crawled back under the covers.

"May I ask why you're up?"

"May I ask why you look like a kicked puppy?" Regina snapped back.

"You first," he said.

Regina brought her legs up on the bed and hugged them to her chest.

"It was another nightmare," she said.

"The same as usual?" Robin asked reaching out to take her hand.

"Worst," Regina said. She laid down as well, turned on her side so that she could face him while she explained. And somehow she couldn't even lie about the dream, smooth out certain details or gory points. No, she had to tell him _every single word._

"God, what kind of mother dreams of murdering her own children?" Regina asked, aghast and bitter at the way the horrific words had tumbled out with a mind of their own.

"I'd say it's a good sign that it _was_ a nightmare," Robin said.

"That doesn't help," Regina smiled. But it did. It always did.

"The Evil Queen is long gone," Robin said. "She left some parts of herself- she left that smile, her boldness, her strength, and even that stunning sense of style, but there's no way for her to reach our children. Because now we have you- thank God. I know I do every day."

"Yes, well, I think there are a number of people who'd have liked her to leave sooner," Regina said.

"Maybe, but it can't be changed." Suddenly his face fell and he looked grave. "Some things we are left with despite our greatest efforts to change them. That's not news to us."

"Why are you so upset?" Regina said.

"Just a product of seeing Faye so sick," Robin said. "I don't even know if sick is the right word. She's not bipolar, she's not- she doesn't… there's nothing that can be described as an illness about her, but there's something wrong. It's because of how she was born. Like it or not, I was a part of that."

"An unwilling, clueless, non-consenting part of it," Regina said. "Robin you didn't know."

"I should have," Robin said. "She- even if I thought Faye's mother was Marian, she wasn't _acting_ like Marian. I just ignored it because I thought I was just missing you, ignored the better judgement which could have spared Faye these fits and this anger and the life she just told me tonight she doesn't want."

"No," Regina said. "You _shouldn't have_ to know anything. It was a crime, Zelena was a monster. I've shown you the papers and the books, it _is_ rape."

"I know," Robin said. "But I only know it in my head. I know it sounds crazy and it sounds flawed, but there are things that are bigger than us and the only way I can digest all of this is a bit at a time. I love Faye, maybe I can tackle another piece now. But for now it doesn't help me stop the guilt and the regret any more than you can stop yours. Like I said, some things we are simply left with. Luckily for me, Faye is a blessing."

Regina rolled onto her back.

"Some things we are simply left with…" she echoed. She reached for his hand. "I hope we can outgrow some of those, the parts we don't deserve or the parts that aren't true."

"I hope so as well," Robin said.

"And for the rest… we can learn to live with our shares, I suppose," Regina said thinking of the agonising guilt in the pit of her stomach. "We can surpass them."

"We can build around them," Robin said kissing her ear. "Did I mention that your other children are fast asleep at the moment, comfortable and fed and loved? Possibly dreaming of being like their mother?"

Their mother who was awake in the middle of the night, full of doubt and anxiety and regret… Walking a constant fine line between what she was and what she wanted to be. And all this at the side of their father, an outlaw who felt cheap and robbed and sometimes overwhelmed with how thinly his past had been spread.

But their parents _were_ together. And the children _were_ sleeping. And for now everything was alright, even for just a small window of time...

"Maybe this is the best we can do," Regina said looking at the ceiling.

"In which case, we could do a lot worst," Robin said.

Regina smiled and nestled her head against his shoulder.

"I don't think we could if we tried," she said.


End file.
